Both of the people who read this blog know that I don’t often do gear reviews, but in the case of the Billville Safety Research Pack Possum™, I felt I had to make an exception.
Nobody was more skeptical than me the first time I saw a couple of German hikers with Pack Possums™, but the more concerned I grew over the danger of ticks, the more it made sense.
Folks who have spent a lot of time on the AT are aware of the dangers of things that want to drink your blood. Savvy hikers know that “want to check each other for ticks?” is routinely voted the #1 pick-up line on the trail, that the mosquito is the official New Jersey State Bird, and that Stratton, Maine is almost completely populated by vampires.
And while mosquitoes and vampires are of some concern, it’s really ticks that pose the greatest risk.
Deer Ticks are abundant along the Appalachian Trail and, in addition to Lyme Disease (which is scary enough as it is), ticks can transmit a whole bunch of other things that I can’t even spell, like babesiosis, ehrlichiosis, anaplasmosis, and tularemia.
And they also give me the heebie jeebies, for which there is no known cure.
So what to do in order to avoid ticks?
Staying on the couch has been an attractive option, because I’m pretty lazy. But eventually I forget that I hate hiking and venture out, so that’s not really a long-term solution.
DEET is apparently composed of the blood of the creatures from the Alien movies, and I once watched it eat a hole through the entire bottom of a backpack. So that appears to be something to avoid. But on the other hand, natural repellents like citronella only seem to make your skin smell nice as things are actively biting you.
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| "TNT" with his Pack Possum™ at Lehigh Gap |
The most popular anti-tick repellent lately is Permethrin, a neurotoxin that people are inexplicably confident about having next to their skin. “It’s perfectly fine,” they say, “the military uses it!” Somehow, though, knowing that Permethrin is used by the organization that thought Agent Orange was safe doesn’t really make me feel any better.
So I’ve been relying on DEET, because while it will melt non-natural fabrics, the part of me that keeps the rest of me inside of me is made entirely of natural fabrics. It has always seemed to me to be the least bad option, up until the release of the entirely all-natural, zero-chemical Pack Possum™.
So I’ve been relying on DEET, because while it will melt non-natural fabrics, the part of me that keeps the rest of me inside of me is made entirely of natural fabrics. It has always seemed to me to be the least bad option, up until the release of the entirely all-natural, zero-chemical Pack Possum™.
My Pack Possum™ arrived in a cardboard box with air holes, and appeared to be dead. Don’t be fooled, though -- it’s most likely perfectly fine. I didn’t fall for this trick mainly because I've had a number of girlfriends who have tried to get rid of me by attempt the same thing.
Weighing in at a hefty ten pounds, the Pack Possum™ is by no means a piece of UL gear, but BSR representative Timothy Scott notes that “it weighs significantly less than the doctor who will treat you for Lyme.”
I took my Pack Possum™ out on a quick weekend trip on the AT, and I have to say it worked exactly as promised. Even while sleeping on my pack during the day, the Pack Possum™ attracted every single tick that would have otherwise attached itself to me, and then when it awoke it groomed itself and ate every single one.
Scott claims that a single Pack Possum™ can consume up to 4,000 ticks per week, a number that I find to be both impressive and terrifying.
So what’s the downside?
Well, weight, as mentioned -- and with all those ticks being eaten, I don’t think this thing is going to get any lighter. Also: it hisses at EVERYTHING. Other hikers, dogs, backpacks, trees, other Pack Possums™. It’s like every moment you’re a person talking in a theater and someone behind you is trying to get you to shut up. The only other issue is that on night two of my first trip with a Pack Possum™ I woke up with its face inches from mine and I had a minor heart attack.
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| Pack Possums™ waiting for their owners to finish their probably tick-free breakfasts. |
But I think the positives far outweigh the negatives.
A Pack Possum™ is the perfect remedy for the tick-infested forest of the Appalachian Trail, and once you get used to the weight the only problem you’ll have to deal with is every person you meet telling you that you have the ugliest cat they’ve ever seen.
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| The author with his Pack Possum™ |
Contrafactual notes: Pack Possums do not exist, although possums do indeed eat an awful lot of ticks. Billville Safety Research is not a real company. Timothy Scott is a real person, but did not say that. The mosquito isn't the the official New Jersey State Bird, but probably should be. And my belief that Stratton, ME is almost entirely populated by vampires has yet to be disproven.
